More buzzwords or less – your choice

Contrary advice – how to add more buzzwords to your documents or remove them!

Firstly, new guidelines from the UK government in an effort to reduce jargon in press releases. Some of the rules are pithy in themselves

deliver – unless it’s a pizza or post

drive – unless it’s cars or cattle

foster – children excepted

key – must be in a lock

tackling – except in sport.

Says the quide “Often, these words are too general and vague and can lead to misinterpretation or empty, meaningless text. We can do without these words.”

There’s also to be no more empowering, facilitating, advancing, collaborating, combating or pledging.

But if you don’t agree with these limits, there’s a tool to help you obfuscate your next PowerPoint presentation.

The Web Economy Bullshit Generator can spit out plenty of meaningless phrases with just a click. It randomly combines verbs, adjectives and nouns to make

  • productize innovative functionalities

  • whiteboard global web-readiness

  • transform impactful portals

  • disintermediate compelling mindshare

and in case you think the generator is joking, try searching for some of the phrases across the web. All too often Google or Bing will find a (near) match.

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